Plot twists galore, this needed an update, for those who follow..

First night in Brazil, at Foz de Iguaçu, I zoomed thru the border, as directed by officials dressed in fatigued fashion. I somehow hoped that this freedom would allow traffic to go to a more appropriate border station, but no! Nope! I later learned that there’s lot of latitude, within 80 kilometers around these 3 countries, because of the falls traffic. Made sense, but I still had to do proper paperwork in the morning, so be it, it’s nighttime anyway, I made it. A hotel was soon found, a nice restaurant nearby, they all take credit cards, we’re all good.

The paperwork was done for me by an eager young customs official, and the big boss was so helpful, she spoke a bit of french, it was painless and pleasant. Yeay I’m in Brazil, all legal and all. The world famous Iguaçu Falls are nearby, so of course I’ll go check this out, this was kind of in the plans all along. It didn’t disappoint, I even went at the bottom of the walls in a boat, well a raft, to get soaked by one or four of the waterfalls! May as well, so that was cool, but of course you had to endure the tourists.

I still have quite a lot of terrain to cover, I enjoy the nice roads and scenery and I didn’t mind another 2 days ride. I took refuge in a gas station for an hour once, it was spectacular water fury, but I wisely waited it out and then the fresh grass cuttings along the road are even more fragrant… So I rode and rode, trying to make up some time, into the late evening and followed my nose for a cool hotel. Lots of universities around, young crowds, perfect. Didn’t have any cash on me so took me about 6 or 7 banks to find an ATM that worked! Now flushed, I’m trying to get a SIM card and this cool kid, Felipe, spontaneously helps me to choose the card, he registered it on my phone with his name and social, what? Photo of his id uploaded in some government office just to be kind to a stranger? Thanks new friend, a little later we’re drinking beers with his work buddies a block away from their offices, that’s hospitality my friends! It was so nice to have a human conversation, great stopover, who wouldn’t love Brazil?

One more riding day, also well into the night, made great strides, only 206 km to go to Sao Paulo tomorrow, real cheap trucker hotel but they had a great meal upon checking, rice and beans and steak and plantains, you know the usual.

And, I reach São Paulo! So fortunate to have a friend, a real one, in this last country, this was the excuse to go on a trip, The Trip! At least I had a goal, an objective, I have an address for the end game! And what a host, thank you my friend for the hospitality, the meals, the company and the sharing… I have enjoyed the biggest city in South America, the culture and the cosmopolitan experience of Saõ Paulo. Such urbanism, the architecture, the food, the masses, the crazy traffic… But I also layed in the hot sun, on an vacation island. I’ve taken in both sides of Brazil and was able to relax a bit, after this hard and tenuous ride through the continent… Forced to slow down a bit, waiting for bureaucracy to grind, hoping for a shipping solution to bring America home so that she can be mended, and me too, The Trip is coming to an end…

Well, hang on there, I still have 5 days before I’m on a plane, if it all works out! This is not over. Tomorrow, unfortunately the weather is not cooperating, 70-85% rain, so no skydiving in Brazil, this time… Plan B is to discover this cute town, well city, of 43000, Paraty dates back from the 1500’s, Portuguese Colonial architecture, I’m sold. I’ll leave early, well… Tenish, so I’ll be able to see the historical center. I’ve booked my non refundable room already, talk about spontaneity ! I’ll arrive in Rio de Janeiro on Sunday! I’ve got a meeting with my shipping agent on Monday. I’ll go to the dock where I’m supposed to drop America and start the whole process. Paletting it, bubble wrapped, into the container that will be on a ship that leaves for San Diego with the right paperwork next Saturday. Everyone said it cannot be done, but that’s what’s going on, so far,thanks of course to my host. Of course it’s more money than I hoped to pay, but the flight home is really cheap, you know the kind, 24h45 long, 2 stops, can’t select your seat, you pay for 1st bag, I don’t care, I’m cheap, that balances everything and I’ll be home soon. Somehow, freakishly unprepared may work out anyway… But wait a minute Danny Boy! Publishing in advance indeed jinxed it all!

It turns out that there is a long standing rivalry between the cities of Saõ Paulo and Rio de Janeiro. Saõ Paulists view their second city congeners as mostly lazy, corrupt and incompetent oafs… I was told that if it’s sunny in Rio no work is being done as everyone must be at the beach. So to recap, we had to wait a number of days before our shipping contact assured us that he was fighting bureaucracy but there was a $4000 solution to ship America from Rio. A steep price to pay, but what can you do? So on my merry way I go, I have the whole weekend to myself as we’re supposed to meet at the port on Monday.

And off I go, profusely making my goodbyes and thanking my best Brazilian friend for the hospitality and the unforgettable good times… A beautiful ride was plotted and I happily stopped half way to Rio to enjoy Paraty. And what a pleasant stopover that was, I happened to be there during a great free music festival, fantastic acid jazz, seriously good blues, really talented musicians and amazing performances well into the night… Everyone is having a grand old time, street vendors prepare delicious Caipirinhas, effluves of ashish perfume the air, it’s like a remake of Haight Ashbury with everyone sporting tattoos. Thousands and thousands of happy people of all ages, I’m incredulous that I found a hotel that day, and that I found it later on that night! Great times…

And I’m finally in Rio de Janeiro ! I decided to stay at Copacabana, a block away from the famous beach, right in the center of it all. Heading to all the unsolicited advice I received from other bikers I met on the road, I’m not riding at night in Rio, today… Solitary dinner at the beach, taking in all the grandeur of the place, Miami Beach, Santa Monica, Cannes and Nice look so puny in comparison… I’m so in awe of Brazil, this is not a developing country, not sirree, it’s already so well developed! All the cities I have seen so far are incredibly modern and clean and huge, In the big two, thousands and thousands of tall apartment skyscrapers, 8 lane highways, thus making L.A risible. I’m flabbergasted, as in Paris, people start going out to dinner at 10 – 11pm, take that San Francisco! The road infrastructure is excellent, well maintained asphalt, no potholes, no litter, gas stations omnipresent, motorcycles pay very little or not at all on the freeways. I’m elated to be in Rio, there are lots of couples on vacation, everyone is so friendly, my flight home is in 3 days, this is happiness!

The shipping guy’s name is Fernando, but let’s call him the bastard from now on! We were supposed to meet early this Monday morning so I could drop the bike and we’d do the paperwork at the port right? Well, the bastard texted me that he’s at the customs office, trying to clear the bike and that we can meet at the warehouse tomorrow ? Ok, one wasted day, but that’s allright, I booked my plane out for Wednesday, giving me extra time in case of complications, I can wait another day, I’ll do laundry then… On Tuesday morning my Saõ Paulo friend calls me up. The bastard had preferred to talk to him in Portuguese first rather than giving me the bad news himself. Something to do with « the process with the Federal Revenue of Brazil » is so screwy that now the price is $7000.00 and there are no guarantee the bike will leave the port anytime soon, and this might incur extra storage costs on top of that… Soon I receive his email with the new quote and I am floored… The bastard really deserves his moniker. Total incompetence, callousness, lack of research before hand, O stop me before I get angry…

I now consider several options, I could fly out tomorrow and leave America here in Rio at a Yamaha service center, have them work on her, might be cheaper to fix her here that in the states?
I’m guessing that they’ll need to order parts, Ténérés don’t run much in these parts so that might take a while, free storage I’m thinking… They gave me 2 months to get the motorcycle out of the country at the Paraguay Brazilian border post, I can come back in a month or so and drive down to Buenos Aires then… Yes there is a real, reputable and definite shipping company in Argentina, I had been in touch with them, gotten a quote to air cargo America for $2600.00, but I foolishly opted to chance it on Rio… Trying to find excuses, almost at the end of this journey, the logic was to avoid another week of riding to Argentina, another couple borders, more hotels, more miles on America who needs some care, more time missing my baby… Once I crossed into Brazil, it had been 3 months already, mission accomplished, so I thought… I had been ready to go home, and I was assured that there was a viable option to ship from Brazil, the bastard! Anyway, I had to make it to Rio of course, who goes to Brazil without making it to Rio? Really ?

On our daily phone calls with the lovely wife, we fantasized about me going home, rest for a month, come back to Rio, ride a fixed America to Buenos Aires and fly Baby for a mini Argentinian vacation before the three of us be on a plane to California… Naturally my lovely wife has a cooler head than mine, who hasn’t, and reason took over. No need for another round trip yet, I’ll bite the bullet and pursue the most sensible, logical and economical solution to this dilemma. Argentina, here I come, again !! Well it’s a good thing that flight out of Rio was cheap, it’s not refundable! Allrighty then, plan B was realized, the Argentine motorcycle shipping businessman solidly confirmed his worth and reputation, and we’re on! Since I’ve prepaid 3 nights in Rio, I’m going to enjoy this stay regardless of my state of mind. On America I ride the streets of this amazing city amidst the mountains. Playing tourist I took the gondolas to the top of the sugarloaf, what a view, bucket list, check! I was there at sunset and stayed well into the night, mesmerized by the twinkling lights well down below, all the beaches, the coastlines, the red Cristo spreading his arms for whatever reason high on another mountain. Another nice dinner on Ipanema beach and this will be a lasting memory, for sure, blame it on Rio!

Four full riding days got me to Montevideo, Uruguay’s capital. That’s where I’m at now. Geez, a marathon indeed, besides a welcome rest at my Saõ Paulo friend’s pad, nothing much to talk about. A last dinner at midnight in civilization, beef wellington, really? I’m still in constant amazement at this great country, still jaw dropping when gazing at the enormous seaside cities with all these great white tall apartment buildings, there’s so much wealth in Brazil, we had no idea… And at least 5 or 6 hours of freeway each day, the weather has been here, wish you were great, kidding aside, the riding wasn’t too bad. Well I’m used to it by now right? I just have to lift my derrière from time to time to relax my butt muscle or lack thereof…

I started singing aloud long forgotten French chidren songs to pass the time, they’re just coming at me in my demented mind, scary! Well I guess I’m still French after all. I have time to think with these extra, unplanned additional free days for myself. The mind wanders, I want meaning. I’m going to think long and hard, why did I take this trip? What did I want out of it? Do I really need or yearn this crazy freedom? Is this my third midlife crisis? I don’t need to impress anybody, I’ve never felt the need to justify myself, but damn, that trip was something else… Bragging rights, that’s about it, but to what end? I guess I’m just following whatever screwy thoughts enter my world, go with the flow I said, let’s see where this takes us. I’m like a spectator with the silent voice in my head, thinking if not now, when? I’m just going to end this chapter now before I go too deep, nobody needs my pseudo psychoanalysis after all, but this is not finished, I’ve got to go home still. Kiss kiss.